New biopsies done. Time to starve the organism to kill the cancer????
Yesterday went very well. I could focus on the 3 punctures for an IV, the fears, the soreness I now feel as my neck is swollen and glued shut after having been cut open and my left hip bites me every time I move. Those things are so easy to let go of as I am just so relieved and thankful for all the comforts of medicine we have today and that it all got done. Dr. Cullinane actually took two lymph nodes and the tissue did make it across the street to Dr. Nagourney's office, as well as to the pathologist at the hospital. I am so relieved that all 3 goals of the day were accomplished when there were so many roadblocks over the past months.
Oh ya, as I am incredibly relieved that I woke up able to smile. When I went to bed last night, only 1/2 my smile worked at all, even though I was no longer numb. The nurse at the hospital was very concerned as was the RN I live with in CA. As I went to bed, I was really concerned it could be a problem. To wake up this morning with the ability to smile...oh, the things we take for granted. Thank you, Lord!
Now, the wait. I have an appointment with Dr. Cullinane 9/19 and Dr. Nagourney 9/21. Of course I hope for positive surprises. The symptoms I am experiencing (AITL induced arthritis, swollen tonsils and adenoids, other aches and pains that move around that feel like I have broken bones sometimes, thickening of mucus membranes as shown on CT scan...) have me doubting I'll get some surprise like no cancer in the hard, swollen lymph nodes they took. I hope, of course, it's not in my bone marrow, which would make it stage IV cancer, for sure. I don't really know what to hope for with Dr. Nagourney. If he comes up with some off label drug that looks good, will it be one with other side effects (they all have them) or will he advise me to start some chemo regime? Could the pathologist change the diagnosis as doctors have told me that lymphoma's morph. I'm on facebook with people who have been diagnosed with both B and T Cell Lymphomas simultaneously. No fun! For now, I leave it all in God's hands and trust that he'll show us when it's time.
Right now I am consumed with the idea of going to True North Health Center in Santa Rosa, CA. I am praying for the willingness to do this. It is a shocking concept - water fasting for probably about 21 days, followed by "refeeding" for another 10 - 11 days, before coming home and committing to a vegan lifestyle for "50 years." Dr. Goldhamer said he was fine with me eating anything I want after that, when I'm 104 years old. If you want more info, look him up and also Valter Longo's interview with Chris Wark. There's so many great videos: The C Word, The Science of Fasting, it's endless.
Dr. Goldhamer called just before I was to act as the donut lady at church Sunday. At first I was shocked that a doctor would call Sunday morning. Then I remembered it is a residential facility with doctors checking on patients twice daily, so they would be working on Sundays. He was non-committal, non-aplogetic for having very little evidence to give me that what they are doing is really working, and very straight forward about all the changes I would have to make to get well and stay well. I am so doubtful that I have what it takes to go so completely against my culture as to eat vegan. I love living life fast and using food and wine as a structure for my social life. Do I want to be alive more than I want to live the way I enjoy and am so entrenched in?
While patients at there, fasting and refeeding for probably about a month in my case, they "brainwash" you with data, videos, and books about why vegan is our only hope in fighting the diseases we are dealing with - epidemics, really. They are especially successful with heart disease, back pain, migraines, and lymphomas. Will I feel enough of a difference to really change? Will I get the same results they have seen before, with total remission in 3 weeks for lymphoma? Will have have the grit to stick to it all to stay well?
Could I possibly start chemo without trying this? Would I always feel like I copped out?
My dear friend is also thinking of going to True North and we'd share a room. We could be a huge support to one another. Are all the pieces falling together, showing me that I need to do this? Time will tell, I guess.
BTW, since I try to include most things in this blog that someday I may want to remember, I've been using Modified Citrus Pectin the past couple weeks, continuing into the future. No less than 3 doctors have told me to use it, especially when getting biopsies, to reduce the chance of metastasis of cancer cells. It is confusing to me how that is an issue with lymphoma but it still is. I asked the ND about how it works and she gave me a very technical answer I can't repeat. Just in case someone else needs that info...
Take good care. Thanks for reading and praying. I feel them and know I'm in The Best of Hands. xoxo
Oh ya, as I am incredibly relieved that I woke up able to smile. When I went to bed last night, only 1/2 my smile worked at all, even though I was no longer numb. The nurse at the hospital was very concerned as was the RN I live with in CA. As I went to bed, I was really concerned it could be a problem. To wake up this morning with the ability to smile...oh, the things we take for granted. Thank you, Lord!
Now, the wait. I have an appointment with Dr. Cullinane 9/19 and Dr. Nagourney 9/21. Of course I hope for positive surprises. The symptoms I am experiencing (AITL induced arthritis, swollen tonsils and adenoids, other aches and pains that move around that feel like I have broken bones sometimes, thickening of mucus membranes as shown on CT scan...) have me doubting I'll get some surprise like no cancer in the hard, swollen lymph nodes they took. I hope, of course, it's not in my bone marrow, which would make it stage IV cancer, for sure. I don't really know what to hope for with Dr. Nagourney. If he comes up with some off label drug that looks good, will it be one with other side effects (they all have them) or will he advise me to start some chemo regime? Could the pathologist change the diagnosis as doctors have told me that lymphoma's morph. I'm on facebook with people who have been diagnosed with both B and T Cell Lymphomas simultaneously. No fun! For now, I leave it all in God's hands and trust that he'll show us when it's time.
Right now I am consumed with the idea of going to True North Health Center in Santa Rosa, CA. I am praying for the willingness to do this. It is a shocking concept - water fasting for probably about 21 days, followed by "refeeding" for another 10 - 11 days, before coming home and committing to a vegan lifestyle for "50 years." Dr. Goldhamer said he was fine with me eating anything I want after that, when I'm 104 years old. If you want more info, look him up and also Valter Longo's interview with Chris Wark. There's so many great videos: The C Word, The Science of Fasting, it's endless.
Dr. Goldhamer called just before I was to act as the donut lady at church Sunday. At first I was shocked that a doctor would call Sunday morning. Then I remembered it is a residential facility with doctors checking on patients twice daily, so they would be working on Sundays. He was non-committal, non-aplogetic for having very little evidence to give me that what they are doing is really working, and very straight forward about all the changes I would have to make to get well and stay well. I am so doubtful that I have what it takes to go so completely against my culture as to eat vegan. I love living life fast and using food and wine as a structure for my social life. Do I want to be alive more than I want to live the way I enjoy and am so entrenched in?
While patients at there, fasting and refeeding for probably about a month in my case, they "brainwash" you with data, videos, and books about why vegan is our only hope in fighting the diseases we are dealing with - epidemics, really. They are especially successful with heart disease, back pain, migraines, and lymphomas. Will I feel enough of a difference to really change? Will I get the same results they have seen before, with total remission in 3 weeks for lymphoma? Will have have the grit to stick to it all to stay well?
Could I possibly start chemo without trying this? Would I always feel like I copped out?
My dear friend is also thinking of going to True North and we'd share a room. We could be a huge support to one another. Are all the pieces falling together, showing me that I need to do this? Time will tell, I guess.
BTW, since I try to include most things in this blog that someday I may want to remember, I've been using Modified Citrus Pectin the past couple weeks, continuing into the future. No less than 3 doctors have told me to use it, especially when getting biopsies, to reduce the chance of metastasis of cancer cells. It is confusing to me how that is an issue with lymphoma but it still is. I asked the ND about how it works and she gave me a very technical answer I can't repeat. Just in case someone else needs that info...
Take good care. Thanks for reading and praying. I feel them and know I'm in The Best of Hands. xoxo
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